A Letter To Emerson

Baby boy,

This is my first letter to you, although you’ve probably been hearing an earful from your mama for a while now… I’d like to apologize inadvance for the incessant singing in the car and the occasional curseword – I’m really praying about that last one.

Today we tried our second attempt at getting a glimpse of you with a4D ultrasound. Our first try, much like your original anatomy scan was not so successful. You proceeded to keep your face covered with your tiny hands and would occasionally play with your favorite toy, the umbilical cord. But I feel like I know you more now and I expected for you to be a bit camera shy. You get that quality from your sweet Daddy.

Today we didn't have much luck either. You decided burying your face in mommy's side would be more fun than being photographed. We did however manage to leave with an adorable picture of your precious little feet and this blurry shot of your profile:

You, my dear are such a magical, new thing in my life but some parts of you (like your bashfulness when it comes to having your picture taken) feel so familiar to me already. For example, your nightly movements and kicks that always seem to occur around 10:30, the roundness of mybelly when I look in the mirror and the growing ache in my lower backand hips.

Other things are not so familiar and continue to lead me down completely new paths. Like the time spent imagining your face, hoping you have my cute nose and your father’s handsome chin. Trying your name out on my tongue and saying it aloud "Emerson Robert Ring". Collecting little blue outfits and vintage cowboy decor for your nursery. Each day I am feeling my way through the uncharted territory of having a baby, a child, a son.

For now, I study your ultrasound photos - looking closely at your tiny bones and features. I keep going back to these grainy photos knowing there is something about this tiny peek into you becoming you that I will always treasure. I am awed by what you have become in 30 weeks time and how much you’ve shifted and shaped our family already. We are making room for you in every part of our home and hearts. We await your newness, anticipate your familiarity and cannot wait for you to arrive.

Love,

Mama